10 things we hate about your movie by 10 Things We Hate About Your Movie
Only one more left after this in T-O-Y July... Thank god.. Its Toy story so see previous episodes.. Its all the same except I think there is more shit talk in this one. Enjoy!
The theme is toys so all toys storys and a bonus of Small Soldiers. Not as good as you remember. Requires a lot of forgiveness from the audience but still has some moments.
3rd in the the chapter for T-O-Y July or Toy-lye or whatever. Its toys.. This one gets a little real. Enjoy!
T-O-Y July rolls on... We given up on being clever. We're doing all the Toy Stories in backwards order because science. This one is on the same plane as TS5. Not bad at all but probably not the strongest. At least we get Duke Caboom... Enjoy!
July is all about toys for some reason... We're going to watch all the Toy Story Movies in reverse order because subversion? 5 was not bad but we'll see what the worst one is in July. Finally the question will be answered. Who cares. Enjoy!
Because grey is a color. This is it. No more color rush movies..
Color rush month gives us this.... The Pink Panther... I don't get it.
Color Rush month continues with a Wes Craven joint. Wes Craven movies suck... There.. no more ifs or buts or giving him time or second chances.. His movies are terrible. God help this movie if Cillian wasn't in it.. Whatever. It has a color in the title so we watched it. Enjoy!
Ashton just had to watch White Noise for her birthday... Well happy birthday. Sorry your movie is so lame.. Justin sticks to what he knows.. you'll see. Great conversation - terrible movie.
Baby face Daniel Stern and the guy from Jaws star in this exciting, fast paced, on the edge of your seat helicopter thriller! All but Chase hated it. Enjoy!
June is Color Rush month. Its colors in the movie title because why not. Red Sonja on account of her red hair. This is like Flash Gordon level. Its so bad but kind of good. Fuckin Arnold was in this.. Go figure. Just proves if you follow legal immigration and start at the bottom, your dreams of having an illegitimate child with your maid can come true. Enjoy!
Finally... Midget May is over and we go out with a small bang. Some redemption for the little folk. An actual movie with midgets playing real characters and not just mischievous little monsters. However, a normal steals the show. Life's not fair. Enjoy!
Midget May lives on! No more bonus episodes this month.. we think. This week we watched Time Bandits and some of us wish we could bandit our time back from this movie...
Because Justin haaaaad to see it....
Just for Justin's Bday. The Justinless cast hates the last movie Justin saw with his dad and celebrate him in the same breath.
May the Midget be with you month continues on with this thing. What is this movie? Gary Oldman as a rebel dwarf with a heart of gold. Matthew McConaughey as a man raised by dwarves now on the edge of sanity. I guess this is one for the midgets but is it? Enjoy
Its Midget May! Because even the halfsies deserve the spotlight. We start off with a blatant exploitation of those horny little guys. 150 midgets and all we got were some caricatures of lustfilled little demons. Shame Chevy Chase... Couple of small moments that were funny.. Enjoy!
Happy Star Wars Day! To honor it, we bash this movie. May the 4th be with you.
It's the end of Catherine O'Hara remembrance month. We had to squeeze this one in for Chase and it wasn't as terrible as Ashton thought!
Its still Catherine O'Hara month and this movie actually has Catherine in it for more than 5 minutes. Its a mockumentary. If you don't like those or don't know what it is, don't not watch it. Its a weird one and kind of hard to follow since they make it up as they go. Kind of like this podcast and Chaseface's life. Enjoy!
This is weak one for Catherine O'Hara month.. She's in it less than Nick Cannon.... Which is some bullshit. Its really just because Justin loves cartoons. He's a cartoon guy. Whatever. just listen
It's Catherine O'Hara month and Ashton's pick was the Amazing Pig Girl. God help this movie... Christina Ricci has a pig nose and needs to get married, but really she just needs to love herself. There... We saved you an hour and 44 minutes of boring elitist pig propaganda. Enjoy!
Its April O'Hara month! We started off pretty strong for once. Enjoy!
Thank god this month is over... The final movie starting a Friends cast member and its Ed.... A story about Matt LeBlanc, a monkey, and backdoor wheeling and dealing by an elite single A baseball team owner's son. Do with that info as you will.
"The One with the Screamer"
Its Friday the 13th so we watched Friday the 13th. again. They are all terrible movies. This one is misleading. Also, we answer a lot of questions that the movie leaves you with.
We continue with this month's theme of Friends cast in a starring movie role... We've run out of ideas.. Leprechaun sucks. Jennifer Anniston is ok in this. Its like Rachel's origin story. Don't expect much. Enjoy!
Friends cast member in a movie month!!!!!!!! First up, this shit with Matthew Perry and Chris Farley. It sucks, but we watched it. Enjoy.
Ending Webruary with a banger. Doing loves instead of hates just feels wrong, but this one was a little easier. Actually not bad even though it has a multiverse in it and some odd other-dimensional spider-people. Enjoy
Webruary continues with the world wide variety. Sandy B saves the world with a Tough Book. They tried to warn us in the mid 90s that the internet will kill you. We didn't listen... Enjoy!
Friday the 13th BONUS! Let me just give a brief synopsis. Jason, the supernatural machete wielding psycho killer, is cryogenically frozen for 450 years. He's, then, taken to space on a trek to Earth 2 where he is thawed and kills people. That's it.
Webruary continues with spider webs... Real spiders, Real on-location footage, and Real John Goodman. Thank god for Dan. There is an odd amount of ball-cupping too. I'm not sure what a good amount would be.. Some ball-cupping but this seemed extreme. It made Justin uncomfortable. He's never had his balls cupped. Maybe jealously... Enjoy!
Webruary. Its like February but with webs either spider or world wide . This one is the latter. Also, because its February, we're doing 10 things we LOVE. Its a gimmick. Honestly, it makes the podcast worse... Enjoy!
Song Title Movie Month is finally over and we end with what you think is a classic.. but its not. Killing Kevin is the only thing that saved this movie. Also, more weirdos in this than you remember. Enjoy!
Chase did a racism... Enjoy!
No Nick. No Ashton. No more semen jokes...finally! Sit down and enjoy a more mature discussion centered around four prepubescent boys stripping down to their tighty whities and holding one another as they take turns crying. The 50's were a different time but they still hated gays and fats. So chow down wide load and enjoy...FATASS!
In this episode Justin gets a mysterious phone call.... Is it a prank call? Is it his ex wife calling to reconcile? Is it his father calling to repair their fractured relationship? Or is it a kidnapper calling for ransom money????? Listen and find out!
JAMSuary. We're doing song title/movie title. Don't overthink it. We're running out of ideas... We start with a 90's classic. However, I'm not sure why it's a classic. I don't get it and now here are the things we hate about it. Happy New Year!
A JTT joint. This movie is an allegory for Chase's life. Doesn't matter how you do it as long as you get there in the end. For instance, you can lie about a young boy's liver transplant, abandon the pizza industry, have an ulterior motive to receive a classic car, or emotionally detach from your brother-in-common-law. It all doesn't matter as long as you arrive at home just slightly late. Merry Christmas Everybody!
My Secret Santa really encapsulates the spirit of Christmas and we discuss that here. This movie brought us so much joy and we take that energy straight from the tv screen right onto the podcast waves. Enjoy our bonus episode and Merry Christmas!
It's the third movie in Christmas in a title month and this week we watched Chaseface's favorite classic Christmas movie, The Grinch! Did the rest of us like it? Listen and see....
A Believer, an agnostic, and an Atheist walk into a bar... I don't remember the rest but the Atheist was memed to death and is in hell. Merry Christmas!
Christmas!! This movie had to have been made knowing that the mayan calendar was ending and the world would never see this god awful movie. Thanks, Justin....
Uhhhh.... Happy Thanksgiving, here's a movie about some milk. Sorry it's a day late.
Another week, another Foodvember movie... Its all junk food too. First it was jawbreaker then candyman, and now this piece of garbage about an ice cream man.... Whatever... Its one of the worst movie ever starring Ron's retarded brother Clint. Enjoy!
Foodvember! I'm not explaining it again. check last episode. Candyman, the story of a former slave turned black on black poltergeist. Almost a good movie. Few more hood characters and a lot less time with whitey and you got a movie. Enjoy!
Foodvember!!! Its November but with food, so movies with food in the title, so candy, so Jawbreaker.... Is it suppose to be funny? Tune in and find out.... Its not funny. Enjoy!
The finale of Witch Please! month... Thank god. Which is what all these movies need. Jesus. Not the worst Halloween movie, but 70's porn vibes really bring it down... or up... am I right, Justin? He's a pervert.. A catchy theme and robots! Enjoy!
Witch Please! Month with maybe a witch in this one. Not certain. Its more like death becomes them.. am i right? Its fine. Good actors, mediocre script, and some fun moments. Thats it. Not as good as grandpa remembers.
Witch Please! Month continues with this Nic Cage vehicle. Historical epic with adventure, depth, and whimsy. A must watch for any plague enthusiast. This explains everything. Enjoy!
Witch Please! I think there's a witch in this movie... Was it Snoke's (Snoke from "Last Jedi") mom? Same gross face.. Making devil babies.. Snoozers... This movie sucks.. 80s were fun but they are over and this is what happens when you cling to them.. Bullshit. Enjoy!
Witch please!! Month. Its October - so movies that have stank ass witches in them. This movie is not as good as you remember. However, if you remember that it sucked, you are correct. All of the movies this month need Jesus. Enjoy!
What a way to welcome in the 90s. Last movie released in theaters in 1989. How fitting. Saying goodbye to Laker dominance, aids, crack, Berlin wall, Steve Perry, etc...
Season 4 baby! JUSTIN IS DIFFERENT!!!!!!!!!!!
There were movies that we enjoyed this season. Here they are. 49 to choose from but only 10 make it. So long Season 3. Enjoy!
We watched 49 movies this season and Chase was present for nearly all of them! Here we discuss some of the worst ones and use a brackett system and a little of Justin's persuasion bias to figure out the worst movie of the season! Enjoy!
Anything goes August and Season 3 is at an end. The movie is fine. Shark personification. He has vengeance in his heart, but he's also shy. A few shark related deaths vs economic instability of an entire town. Its a tough one. Just listen.
Its a movie about a board game. Justin's favorite board game. Not to be confused with his favorite bored game... Touching himself to Saved by the Bell. This was a fun one and we learned things about Chase that no one should know. Enjoy!
Anything goes August and Chase chooses a banger. How did Andie McDowell keep getting work...? Justin. He loves it when girls talk dolphin to him. Enjoy!
Because Chase made a meme.....
Anything goes August is here and for our first selection... A midget in a duck costume that arrives to Earth through the interdimensional rift via laser spectroscope that creates a cosmic inversion pulse that creates trans-dimensional particle displacement from here t othe Nexus of Sominus. In other words, it sucked.... Enjoy
Thank god Jurassic July is over... But it ends with this mess of a movie...
Another Jurassic July movie. This one is fine. We only have one more this month after this one. We regret everything....
Alan Grant is back with another banger! JK. This movie is bad. The stars of this film are divided into two tribes, people and raptors. They are given a small amount of supplies to get what they think they will need to survive. Tensions rise when Tea Leoni confronts following a Raptor at the tribal council meeting. Nerves plague both tribes as they each wait for resolution to their conflict.
Lost World sucks. Now its out there and that's that
Jurassic July! Its where, in the month of July, we watch Jurassic Park movies and list 10 things we hate about them. Can't-miss Podcast. Don't be the only one who didn't listen and is now ostracized from society, can't maintain a healthy relationship, and has a drinking problem. Also, Happy Birthday America!
Athlete Movie Month comes to an end with Chase selecting this one cuz Arnold is Mr. Universe. I guess it counts. Its fun ride with no meat at all. Arnold lifts a phone booth out of the ground with a dude in it. Thats pretty sweet, also the highlight of the film. Enjoy
Athlete Movie Month continues with arguably one of the greatest athletes of all time, Wayne Knight. Golf, basketball, dinosaurs.. you name it, this movie has it. Anyway, listen for all the things we hate about Space jam.
Justin and Chase secretly made a bonus episode due to Nick and Ashton's disdain for the Friday the 13th franchise. Nick hates the franchise due to its exploitation of young hot honeys and Ashton hates it because of the lack of representation for Mike's hot honey. Regardless, Chase and Justin have curated their favorite Jason kills out of the franchise. Enjoy!
Athlete Movie Month continues with another NBA champion, Dennis "The Worm" Rodman. Where to begin with this one... Convolution meets contradiction in this movie. Nothing makes sense. It felt like the creative leaders of this film were making up the script as they filmed and then threw in Dennis Rodman just because. Enjoy.
It's Athlete Movie Month because why not. So we start with the Shaq vehicle, "Kazaam". He's a genie with stupid-fresh hip-hop style. Be forewarned, there are threats of anal insertion in this film. Seriously... it happens. Big surprise: Justin loves it! Enjoy!
Because Justin loves this movie franchise for some reason... This movie sucks. Michael is now motivated by emotion for some reason, evil is transferable through touch, and no one cares about poor Ted Hollister. Remember, no one wants an oinker for a daughter. Enjoy!
Some of us liked it more than others... Enjoy!
"Return" Month (return of the jedi... May 4th...) continues with the point of none of it. Its what I thought was an action movie but not really. Its like a romance thriller but not really. Its not really that good.. or bad... Kind of like Brigette Fonda. Enjoy!
May the Fourth... so we did Jedi and the rest of the movies have "return" in the title... idk.. who cares? I bet you can't guess which character Justin spanked it to? Its penguin. Enjoy
Here we have one of our favies return of the jedi. Nick has a lot of fun while shaking yoda and laughs way too much. Justin and Chase barely talk at all and Ashton is perfect once again. This is a fun one, enjoy!
We end Parkinson's awareness month with this.... terrible movie. No one wanted this movie; no one needed this movie. We love Michael J, but this ain't it. Goodbye Parkinson's disease.
We're shaking and spilling our way through Parkinson's Awareness month with another Michael J. joint. This one is has everything; ghosts, serial killers, eccentric FBI agent, Sean Astin's dad, a box cutter, flashbacks and black guy sass (Justin's favorite). Remember, 1 in 6 people will get Parkinson's. So always ask yourself, is it just that you haven't eaten or haven't had a cigarette OR is it The Palsy. Happy April!
Parkinson's Month continues with another Michael J. jam. He turns into a wolf and is even more cool in high school. He better be thanking his lucky stars that Justin wasn't in this universe because he would have snatched up Boof before teen wolf realizes how special she really is. BOOF!
April is Parkinson's awareness month so Michael J Fox movies made sense. Muhammad Ali just doesn't have the catalog. I guess we could watch his fights and list 10 things we hate about it, but doesn't really align with our podcast. Also, how would that work? Like I hate that punch in the 2nd round. Doesn't work. Anyway... The Hard Way - Chase was very disappointed that this was not rated X. Enjoy!
Charch (Chase and March combined) is coming to a close. Far worse than regular red dynamite; black dynamite will blow suckas away. Same with black kung fu, black deductive skills, black heroism, black writing, black acting, and black tar heroin. It's like seeing the world with the lights off. Obviously, Justin hated it. But Charch goes out with a bang, a black bang which is larger in both size and effectiveness. Enjoy!
Charch is afoot. Its the month of March combined with the name Chase because Chase is choosing movies this month.. The month of March. 2025. And this week, its Ravenous. A documentary on Walkathons to raise money for scurvy, a disease cause by lack of vitamin C and can lead to the gum disease GINGIVITIS. Its a boring film. Enjoy!
Chase Month continues with a banger. I don't even know how to describe this movie. Terrible in all the right ways. The awe of this movie would not allow for traditional hates. We just had to cover this film chronologically with the script to have any semblance of a cohesive conversation. A just watch prior to listening.
Its Chase Month. God help us all. He's picking all the films this month based on the high impact of the films in his life. Which means we need to prepare ourselves.. He started light with the lighthearted Hackers that ushered in a whole generation of people changing halting the use of the password "God". Justin has some complex feelings about Angelina's role in this one. Enjoy!
Its the Fifth Element and we love it. Don't worry, we get back to hates next week. That is all.
SciFi-bruary continues as we list the ten things we LOVE cuz Valentines. I think this one gets rowdy. I don't really remember. I'm sure it's a fine episode. Justin and Ashton probably argue, Chaseface probably drones on about something, and Nick probably says something inappropriate followed by awkward silence because no one thinks it's funny. Enjoy!
Continuing SciFibruary and top ten loves, today we have Serenity. Its got action, intensity, pretty sweet special effects, rape-first cannibals, government overreach and corruption, spirituality, and heart. So, Justin doesn't get it. Enjoy!
It's SciFi-bruary! Finally... So, SciFi movies. AND In honor of St. Valentine, a 3rd century Roman clergyman who's skull is on display in Rome and is the patron saint of epilepsy, we're not doing 10 hates. We self-induced seizures, and when we came to, we decided to do 10 loves! Boom! Subverted!
JAMSuary is finally coming to an end. Thank God. What do all the following have in common: A dog with headphones, a cat with sunglasses, a lemur with a jacket, an iguana with an earring, and a raccoon with a poncho? Give up? Chaseface. nailed it.
Its a movie with music as an element to the film, so we watched it for JAMSuary. I'm sick, so this is all you get for a description. It's coyote ugly... what do you want?
JAMSuary forges on with a little hidden gem of a musical. This movie is like the mighty and majestic giraffe. It looks weird and has oddly weird features and behaviors, but runs 30 miles per hour and when they’re born they're dropped out of the womb on to the ground from 10 feet above.
JAMSuary continues with a Rock & Roll fable set in another time and another place. A story about young Willem Dafoe who's only dream was to make fly-fishing apparel fashionable enough to wear everywhere. He will do anything to achieve this dream: kidnapping, possibly rape, disturbing the peace, and hammer fights. But Rick Moranis, the inventor of bow ties, throws his money around to make sure that dream doesn't happen. Listen to this one!
JAMSuary is here! That means we're watching movies with music being an element of the movie. This movie.... The Whoopster (as Justin refers to her when he's taking a late night bubble bath) leads this ridiculous movie. It's like Pitch Perfect and God had a litter of nuns and then one of the nuns didn't know she was a nun growing up and became a lounge singer (straying from God) and witnesses a murder and then finds her way back to God by singing oldies and replacing the word "baby" with God. Nailed it.
I know what you're thinking... Another movie about going to a Wendy's in Miami on Fourth of July. You could not be more wrong. Its about a chiseled snow sculpture that comes to life because of a hand-me-down scarf that still has "magic" on it from previous use... He comes to life and is aware of his birth from snow to man and can communicate amazingly through God's Language.. American English. Don't expect much.
I guess we're doing Snowman movies.... Another Jack Frost. Its different than the last one. Felt like a teenager wrote it, a 9 year old filmed it, and weirdo directed. Let's be honest, we watched this so no one else has to.. Terrible film, but some lovable moments. Like when a psycho killer is fuzed with snow to form the ultimate killing machine in a sleepy town. I got nothing for this.. just listen
Jack Frost... This movie cost $85 million. Michael Keaton plays a 40 something trying to break in to the music industry with The Jack Frost Band playing the same music that hasn't gotten him anywhere in 20 years. Then finally several people enjoy it ,and the record company wants him to sign! Hold on! He has to play at the record execs house on Christmas Day in a battle of the bands and then he dies. He comes back as a snowman and nothing really happens. $85 million. Sadly, it lost $50 million. Those are real numbers. Movies are bullshit! Merry Christmas Jesus. Sorry your movies suck...
December is here, and its a time when we celebrate Jesus's birthday by watching movies that have a slight connection to it starting with "Santa's Slay". Justin's favorite Christmas movie. It stars Goldberg (it's not ironic - Jesus was Jewish). I don't know if Goldberg, the wrestler, is jewish. Honestly, this is the first time I've even thought about it. A big bulky Jewish wrestler that play Division 1 football? Idk... Anyways this movie is Santa as Satan that lost a 1000 year old bet.. but 1000 years is up. Enjoy!
Hey, all you Goofy Goobers out there! I've got one word for you... Hey! Now that I've got you, I have more words. This buddy comedy tells the tale of two buddy comedians with interaction, misadventures, and camaraderie between the two main characters who often had opposite personalities, background, and circumstances. The comedic dynamic arises from their contrasting traits, resulting in humorous situations leading to personal growth. Join us as we shit on a kid's cartoon movie.
Good Burger. Soooooooo... Justin's favorite was Dan Schneider. End of description.
Nickelodeon November continues with a Jim Carrey vehicle... Post 9/11 Jim Carrey sucks. There. Now its out there. Seriously, go look at his catalog. Its real. Justin will talk about the greatness of Eternal Sunshine, but its not great or good or thought-provoking or any other hyperbolic superlatives... Its so-so at best. So the real questions we should be asking ourselves is.. What role did Jim Carrey play in 9/11? Was the weight of his conscience manifesting in his films? Does he have a secret sexual relationship with Justin? We have to be brave enough to confront the truth and ask questions. Anyway This movie sucks. Enjoy.
